kah2004's Diaryland Diary

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...01.04.03 Saturday...

well... well... well.��so the HTML release didn't help me much last nite... tho I was on the phone when I was doing that... so I was just a lil' distracted... LOL.

So... what's happened.��My Grandma's sister died last Sunday and the funeral was on Friday in Mt. Vernon... my mom left Thursday nite for it.��So she's staying over in Seattle another day... and asked me to consider coming over tomorrow w/ my dad when he takes Taylor back to his apartment... ARGH... school starts on Monday.��So... w/ the funeral and all... I guess my Grandma's doing fine... considering her sister just died.��My mom said the funeral was sad (it was her Aunt who died..._ and Grandma was jst quiet the whole time... prolly like she was @ Grandpa's funeral back in '99.��Man... that was an insane time.��He was lucky b/c he passes away in his sleep... on Feb. 16th... 2 days before his birthday.��And so we had the funeral on his birthday... it was really kinda strange, b/c the 18th is also my dad's b-day... and so we had a cake @ the funeral to celebrate my Grandpa's life and my dad's growing older.��I think then I had met my aunt Nevada (she just died...), but am not sure.��So that's why only my mom went to pay her respects.

MAN... w/ the funeral... I think it's hitting home to all of us that Grandma could die any day now.��That's prolly one reason my mom asked me to go over tomorrow w/ my dad... and I think I will, too.��It just seems like the... right thing to do...?��I have all good memories of my Grandma... so I just wanna be there to see her... b/c once school gets back on track... anything could happen.��WOW.��Talk about a depressing subject.��Death is never fun.��::sighs::��One of these days... I won't be @ school b/c of a death in the family.��I've been to two funerals in my life... and the first one was when our ol' neighbor died, but I was too young to feel any remorse or whatnot... and w/ my Grandpa... I didn't really know him that well... so I didn't cry @ all @ his funeral.��I remember feeling strange about that... b/c I was there w/ all my aunts & some cousins... and they all were crying... but I wasn't.��::shrugs::��I didn't know him that well... so his passing didn't affect me that much.��::sigh::��That kinda sounds like a heartless ol' bitch... but it's truly how I felt.��I don't cry that often... meh...��So... I know, tho, @ my Grandma's funeral... whenever that may be... I will be crying.��My Grandma is really cool... and just seeing her in so much pain... and so feeble looking... it's really hard.��I just don't know what to do... or who to turn to... I still wish that she'd pass away in her sleep like Grandpa did... then she wouldn't be in any pain anymore...

ARGH... That's all I'm gonna say.��Got up @ 10:06... and jumped in the shower. �That certainly woke me up. �But that's a good thing. �Ate some food and now here I am... trying again @ all this HTML stuff... sometimes it's just so fun to do... and other times I wanna know more... but don't really wanna... or something like that.��Man am I making since today... great sense!! �That's me... "Meep of Innocence" or "The Killing Kamillie"... hehehe... better not piss me off... hehehe... I may try my dad's new machete on you!! HAHA KIDDING!!! I'm only kidding!! But... really... damn... guys don't know how easy they have it... the curse of being female. Not being a woman, mind you... b/c we all know I'm not a woman... I'm a chic (get it right!).... LOL... But... still... school... Monday... need to find my missing calculator (how the hell did that happen!?!?!) and... ya... gonna go for now.... Latas... Sometimes You Feel Like A Fuck, Sometimes You Don't

1:07 PM - 01.04.03 Saturday

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