kah2004's Diaryland Diary

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...I think I found a truth serum...

-Please read-

take a look @ the archives... and see what's new there...

In the last 24 hours, have you...
Cried? sure have.
Helped someone? at some point...
Bought something? No--wanted to go on a candy raid... but rents wouldn't let me.
Gotten sick? sick of...?
Gone to the movies? I watched a movie...
Gone out for dinner? no-- eating Chung's doesn't count.
Said "I love you"? only talking about how I can't say it.
Written a real letter? nope--there's a couple I need to write and I'm not writing...
Moved on? I'm trying to...
Talked to an ex? yep
Missed an ex? missed him asking "why" all the time-- you can never ask "why" too much... it's better than not ever asking "why"
Written in a journal? yep yep yep.
Talked to someone you have a crush on? actually--it's not a crush-- it's more of some very wishful thinking... aye, Karen?
Had a serious talk? no one realizes how serious our late nite talks are.
Missed someone? I miss not knowing-- if anything.
Hugged someone? Me & Karen shared many hugs.
Fought with your parents? thankfully no.
Fought with a friend? I don't fight w/ friends.

Do you...
Wear eye shadow? nope.
Put on a "front"? Always have and always will-- only my friends know that it's a lie and make me spill the real deal.
Kiss on the first date? ...have I ever been on a date...?
Have a crush on someone? not at this moment.
Eat with your mouth open? I've learned my manners.
If you got a tattoo, where would you get it and what would it be? Sorry. If I told ya--I'd have to kill ya.
What color is your floor/carpet in your room? Come to my room and see--it's too hard to explain.
What was the last CD you bought? I bought Chevelle and The Used. I highly recommend them.
How did you spend last summer? In Florida soaking up the sun & watching my bros and cousins get drunk as hell.
When's the last time you showered? Yesterday after redying my hair.
Are you tired? Seeing as how me & Karen got only 3 hours of sleep... just a teeny bit...
Are you lonely? Define lonely b/c it could mean so very many things right now for me.
Are you happy? WOW. this is what Laughlin wrote on that poem-- and I actually know that I am drifting on the edge of (for me) depression... it's not fun. I need to stop hiding.
Are you wearing pajamas? Nope. I'm dressed in clothes.
Are you talking to someone online? I'm waiting to take Karen home-- so we're kinda talking.
What color are your eyes? dark dark dark dark dark brown-- almost black.
What color is your hair? It's black w/ blue-green-turquoise-aqua like streaks in it. The color of those streaks is still up for debate. Come over and see for yourself.

LAST PERSON...
[You Touched] me
[You Talked to] Karen
[You Hugged] Karen
[You Instant messaged] Caitlin
[You Yelled At] noone
[You Had A Crush On] Chris
[Kissed] Chris
[Who Broke Your Heart] Have I ever fallen enough to have it broken...?

FAVORITE...
[Food] Pizza!!
[Drink] Define "drink"
[Color] Black--always & always!!
[Album] At this moment I'm really feeling Chevelle and The Used.
[Shoes] My Clarks are hella comfy!!
[Candy] Twix & KitKat & Snickers & Hersheys...and ya can't forget the Twizzlers!!
[Animal] Tigers--look @ my room! :-)
[TV Show] Angel & Friends & The Simpsons
[Movie] A Fish Called Wanda, War of the Roses, The Thomas Crown Affair, and...
[Dance] freaking and Karen says I should say "...with who...?" and I decided that 3 ppl are all even in that area... coughcoughcodycoughcoughtycoughcoughskycoughcough
[Song] I'm really feeling Chevelle's "One Lonely Visitor" right now...
[Vegetable] tomatoes, carrots, and cucumbers
[Fruit] I like most all fruits...
[Cartoon] Tom & Jerry baby!!!

ARE YOU...
[Understanding] Try to be b/c no one was w/ me...
[Open-minded] I'm more open-minded than my dad. That's all that counts.
[Arrogant] I can be arrogant in a coupla brief seconds... otherwise I'm humble to the core.
[Insecure] I'm insecure about my impression on other ppl and about what I can achieve in life.
[Interesting] Are you sleeping yet...? If not... then I guess I'm interesting enough!
[Random] "There's a brown spot on the sleeping bag..."
[Hungry] We have no food.
[Friendly] I guess so-- I try to be.
[Smart] Whatever floats your boat.
[Moody] yeah
[Childish] Define "childish"
[Independent] I wish I could be-- I try as much as I'm allowed... have you not noticed the hair...?!?!?!
[Hard working] yes
[Organized] Yes--except for that corner in my room and Karen's lil' corner over there *points*
[Healthy] ...uh...sure...
[Emotionally Stable] FUCK NO. I can play it off as being so... but underneath it all I'm one fucking hurricane.
[Shy] I always will be in some way or another.
[Difficult] Define "difficult"
[Attractive] I'll tell ya when someone says so.
[Bored Easily] What's that spot on the wall over there...
[Messy] I'll always have that corner in my room (not Karen's corner of course)
[Thirsty] I always have water at hand.
[Responsible] Very.
[Obsessed] Define this word... "obsessed"...
[Angry] yes--at rents--wanna go renting soon anyone...?
[Sad] Haven't been happy for a coupla months... and even when I was... I was realizing my misery...
[Happy] Read above...I'm happy to get some things off my chest...so to speak...
[Hyper] Have you ever witnessed me & karen on my hardwood floors in socks...? If not-- you haven't lived...
[Trusting ] Very much so-- but fuck with me and lose that trust... you're pretty much fucked where I'm concerned...
[Talkative] Does last nite count...? If so... then extremely
[Legal] Define "legal"
[Original] I'm KAH... what more do you ask?
[Different] Karen says "All the time" so I'm going w/ that!
[Unique] If you want unique... then define "KAH" for me...
[Ignored] Past 17 years baby.
[Reliable] I try to always be--but please don't try and take advantage of that...
[Content] Only time I've felt "content" was the day of the fire drill and I had AFI's "The Greatest Disappointment" blasting in my ears as I walked around the track...
[Optimistic] About...?
[Deep thinker] My thinking has gotten me in trouble (or lack of trouble) more than not.
[Self-disciplined] Yep-- but will someone please tell my rents that?!?!
[Sleepy] Did I not mention we got 3 hours of sleep...?
[Lonely] Define lonely b/c it could mean so very many things right now for me.
[sXe] No comment.

WHO DO YOU WANT TO...
[Kill] Honestly... I'll have to say rents.
[Slap] Robert.
[Get Really Wasted With] Same four as down there... as well as Ana & Jay...
[Get High With] We actually talked about this... and it's Cody, Alex, Tyler, and Chris...
[Tickle] ...as of late... I tickle everyone...
[Look Like] ...uh...

3:45 PM - 04.02.03 Wednesday

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